I have been blessed. I have been blessed with a beautiful life and the latest adventure has been motherhood. George Augustine was born on November 15, 2012. The past ten months have been a sleepy, amazing journey into parenthood. I could say all those cliche things about how your heart grows and you never knew how much you could love another person this much. And that is definitely all true but mostly I am just struck by how fast it all is going by and I want to hit the pause button just for an instant so I can freeze this memory of his baby days.
I keep saying that if I were to start a new blog on life with a new baby I would title it “Love and Milk”, because these early days are really mostly comprised of these two things. And at the end of the day all he really needs from me is a belly full of milk, my loving embrace and attempt at singing a lullaby. And as I lay him down I tell him “Kali̱nýchta Georgie, sagapó̱” (Goodnight Georgie, I love you). Greek side note: goodnight in Greek is pronounced cahlee-neet-ah, and I love you is pronounced saw-ga-poh.
This first year of his life is full of so many developmental milestones and he is growing so quickly that I can’t help but recognize the reality that someday soon he is going to be an adult with a life and talents all his own. I am struck by this Cracker Jack box kind of feeling. What will he be? What will he look like? What things will he like? I am then instantly transported back to present day and I squeeze him extra tight and soak up his baby smell and sweet babble sounds.
In the first few weeks of caring for a tiny newborn I could hardly imagine having a second child. But now as I watch his tiny newborn hands transform into toddler hands that grasp everything around him I can understand now why you would crave that tiny newborn presence in your arms again. These early days are so very precious, especially as a first time mom. Mostly they have been an education into everything from breastfeeding to sleep schedules and communication.
If I were to sum it up into a job title it would definitely be teacher. I think that is partially why this current phase is so equally mentally and physically trying. At ten months he is crawling everywhere, and soon to be walking, all at full speed. But he is also so much more aware of everything around him and I know he understands a limited vocabulary, although he has yet to really say his first word.
So for now I am just relishing these baby days where he just loves me, without hesitation and judgment. I don’t yet have any annoying habits and all he knows is that I love him. And I have milk whenever he needs it. I love my new job. But I also am itching to write again. So now that we have a somewhat reliable morning nap going, it is time to dust off this blog and clear the cobwebs from my mommy brain. Yes, mommy brain is real. I have the list of “oops” moments in the past few months to prove it, but more on that later.